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Bonny Stephany Su
"Cheesin"
Warning: Read with Caution
So it has taken me a while to think about to say. It takes me a while to be in the mindset and let how I feel be put into the words. I guess words can be funny in the sense that you can take the same combination of words and result in a different meaning, not to mention the tone they are spoken in. I have never been good with expressing how I feel with words. I either say the wrong words or portray not what I intended to say. =] ( I'm trying to include some of these) I just wanted forewarn you if I say something stupid, that I often do. I often write more of how I feel instead of saying them because I become more tongue tied and am able to methodically sort through my thoughts when I write.
THE OUTER:
The thing that appeals to me the most about you physically, if you have not noticed, is your eyes. When I look into them, I see who you are and nothing less than spectacular as corny as that sounds. When people look into someone's eyes, you are able to tell so much like if they're lying, telling the truth, genuine, deceitful, dishonest, pure of heart. To simply state it, your eyes encapsulates me. I once asked you what you did not like about yourself which is basically saying the imperfections, and those imperfections does not make someone ugly. I think the perception of beauty has been stripped away from its true meaning. I think what makes someone's special is what sets them apart from everyone else. Those imperfections are what make you not like "everyone else," therefore the true thing making you beautiful. It may sound a little silly but i like your hands too; I think your hands are pretty. Especially when they are not all chipped up and stuff. :p
PS. you're an awesome dancer: ballet, ribbon dancer, ballroom dancer, finger dancer, and all the other ones you have yet to show me.
THE INNER:
Your personality is what appeals to me the most and makes you beautiful. I think the thing that makes us unique is that the amount that we talk has no comparison to the amount we have actually hung out. I could probably count the number times ironically. I think it is all compensated with the amount that we talk to each other. It's quite uncanny of how much I could talk to you and still never get tired of it. It is also unique is that when we do finally hang out, it's just like our phone conversations and flows completely natural. The thing that makes your personality so special is your genuineness, confidence, and pure heart. I totally agree with you when it comes to posers in life or simply a phase we go through. I think you being genuine is what appeals me the most. I think a majority of people, including myself, are still searching of who they really are and who they truly want to be. I think you being genuine is doing what you do because you want to and not being forced to. I find that we all fall into social traps and sort of lose ourselves to the people we hang around with and the atmosphere we set ourselves in. With all the stories you have told me, all the adversity, you have not conformed and stayed true to yourself and your beliefs. I think once we lose our ethics and values; we have lost ourselves. I find your confidence contagious! =] At one point, I see Bonny petrified of wasps or bees, but when she is faced with a huge exam or fighting match, the perseverance and confidence is expelled and giving up is simply not an answer. Your vulnerability is what makes you precious, and your confidence is makes you contagious. Your pure heart is also what makes you beautiful. Personally, when talking to you, I just want to become better. Not because you are telling me to but because I want to. Pure of heart does not only mean innocence but also a heart for others. I honestly see that you have a heart for others when it comes to friends and family. There are always instances that you cannot please everyone, and it tears you apart that you can't. When someone can learn to give their heart to others is when have truly learned to love themselves. I probably lack giving my heart to others because of betrayal and becoming jaded from everything. I am trying to work on that by the way.
Probably the Most Important Reasons:
I am pretty surprised that I have not scared you off with my weird habits or constant ramblings. I am not the most athletic person nor the smartest person out there. The only things I ever really promise is that you are having fun when talking to me or hanging out with me; without that, there really is no point. You really are the best ballroom partner I have danced with, not because of your technique or mad dancing skills, which are all awesome, but whenever we make a mistake, we can simply laugh things off. I all-around have the most fun when talking and being around you. I can see you growing as a person. I admire you the most that you are still wanting to become a better person than you already are. I think we all should strive to become better than we once were by learning from mistakes and challenging our beliefs. I think that if our values and beliefs are never challenged, then we will never know how deep they are rooted in who we are. It reminds me when you said you hate chameleons. A chameleon merely challenges his color to match his surroundings accordingly and still staying the same inside. I think that is the major difference between a chameleon and someone who is simply adjusting in adversity. BUT. I can't stop learning more and more about you honestly. If it were up to me, I would like to listen about your pasts, childhood, beliefs, thoughts, quirky thoughts, and wants in the future all day long because you are that awesome to me.
fin
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